"Sinful Love"
by Jade Karen Cariaga
It's already 12 midnight and I'm still awake. Thinking for something, thinking for someone. An hour passed by but I couldn't get myself into sleep. Maybe, I was just in a midst of my wonderful imagination.
It's 3 AM already and I was about to sleep when my phone rung. I wonder if who it was at this very early. "Maybe, it's my bestfriend, Jocelyn" I shrugged. So I quickly grabbed the phone on the table beside me hoping for Jocelyn's long sweet message. But was a shock when I found out that it wasn't my bestfriend; It's unknown. I paused a little bit thinking who it might be. "Weird" I just uttered. Without any clue, I read the message..."Stop thinking of me, Go to sleep...?" I read it loudly in a questioning tone. I glanced at the window wondering if there's someone looking at me but I found nothing. "It's really weird. How did this got my number? A stalker? Tsh" I asked myself while rolling my eyes. " Maybe, its God commanding me to sleep now" I convinced myself from that thought. So I decided to turn the lighty and get myself into sleep.
I woke up as the sun's rays touches my skin. I did some warm-up exercises before taking a bath.
The coldness of the water running through my body made me feel refreshed. I dressed up in a plain white T-shirt and yellow below-the-knee skirt then put some scents on my body. "Yeah, it's Sundate with God" I said while looking myself at the mirror. I smiled then left the room and had some breakfast downstairs.
It's 7:30 AM so I decided to leave the house and go to church. I walked.
I was about to lock the gate when I saw someone. Some I was thinking of last night. It was her. I stared at her for a couple of minutes but she was busy on her phone. "Hey, Cathy, let's go!" Yeah, her name's Cathy.
We walked together going to the church. I just couldn't stop myself smiling, smiling for the thought that we're walking together.
It was a successful ceremony then we got home...together again. We were in the middle of walking when she stopped me. "Ahm..."
"Yes?"
"Ahm...I-I j-just w-want t-to...ahm..." I waited. "...ahm...never mind hahaha" she said
"Okay...?" what's with this lady? Tsh. We're near at our houses when she stopped me again.
"Ahm...is it considered sinful to be oart of the LGBT community?"
"Don't tell me, you're a lesbian?" I asked but I feel a bit of sadness inside of me for unknown reason. I didn't wait for her answer and continued, "You know, being a gay or lesbian is considered a sin beacuse itsy like they're not appreciating what Gid has given to them...But, it is also said in the bible that those who committed that kind of sin will be forgiven if they're aware of their sin and seek forgiveness from Him"
"Ah..."she said while nodding. "Don't over imagine but I just asked it" then we both enter our houses.
"Again, it's 12 midnight and I was also wondering on the question Cathy has asked me. Because I'm also guilty on what I answered. I just realized that through the years, I started falling for her. She filled my mind every night and even present in my dreams. She distracted my mind enough. She made me crazy. I'm a girl who has fallen inloved with a girl also. I'm inloved with Cathy.
I was in the middle of emoting when my phone rung. I read it hurriedly then the same unknown receipient last night sent a new message. "I know, this is wrong but I'm into you...?"
I know, this is wrong but I'm into you.
I know, this is wrong but I'm into you.
I know, this is wrong but I'm into you.
I know, this is wrong but I'm into you.
I know, this is wrong but I'm into you.
The message continuously echoed in my mind. "Who are you?"
"Ugh, it was a tiring day". I just sighed forgetting what I've just read and went to bed.
Early in the morning and I tried calling the unknown number, but they're all rejected.
While at the garden, I called the number again; It was rejected. I tried it again after several minutes, while ringing, I heard a phone ringing just near me. I followed the sound. It was on my West! I followed the sound.
But I didn't notice that I was already standing and walking towards our neighbor.
And there I saw a phone ringing. I watched it and saw my number flashing on the phone's screen. And there I saw her running towards me, towards her phone. Could anyone explain what's happening here? Could someone even explain to me why Cathy's running towards me? Anyone???
It was a long silence so I asked, "What's with this, Cathy?"
She was standing in front of me, holding her phone while facing the floor. "I dunno, I just found myself falling in love with you" she said while not looking straight into my eyes.
Moment of silence.
Moment of silence.
Moment if silence.
Moment of silence.
I couldn't explain if what should I feel at that moment. Would I say that I'm also inloved with her? That I can't stop myself from loving her? I didn't know how to react.
My heart's telling me to say 'I love you too', but my mind's reminding me that it's wrong, it's a sin.
~end~
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